Funny Gambling Puns
Categories Pun of the Day Tags casinos, gambling, monks, religion Leave a comment Gambling addicts who see those Vegas casino lights don’t have a chance. Funny pictures of really horrible, and terribly lame puns that will make you regret the day you Googled it.
They told me “you gotta know how to hold em, and how to fold em.”
🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️Dad out.
... why do they call it para-dice?
I bet them I could go longer than them without gambling.
'Did you win?' he asked.
'Of course not,' I replied. 'We didn't even run.'
you poker
this is because its clearly nacho lucky day if you lost that much
'You're no better yourself!' he snapped.
I said, 'Exactly. That's why I don't encourage it.'
High steaks
Too many damn cheetahs.
Me: How did you like Atlantic City?
Dad: It was great! I came home with a small fortune!
Me: Wow! How did you manage that?
Dad: Well, I left home with a large fortune.
My friend was just about done gambling and he said this.
Friend: well I guess I'm done.Dealer: alright I can color you up if you want.friend gives the dealer his chipsFriend: I'm going to need what Obama promised us Americans?Dealer: what?Friend:'change'Dealer:....
Our other friend started laughing too hard and had to leave the area.
Because there are too many cheetahs.
(got this from my dad, in a chain email no less.)
Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?
This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas , but there are more Catholic churches than casinos.
Funny Gambling Puns Pictures
Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed.
Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to collect the offerings.
The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.
This is done by the chip monks!
Too many Cheetahs!
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Following on from our recent posts about the fun of having a crack at winning big playing casino games, bingo and poker online we have a few classic one liners for you. They cover all topics such as poker, slots and other casino games like blackjack.
To complement this blog post here is a cheesy stock image of the topic :p We hope you like it.
Funny Gambling Puns
Read on below for the goodies.
Short Casino Jokes
Funny Gambling Puns Jokes
What is the difference between praying in a church and praying in a casino? In a casino, you really do mean it.
How do you get a sweet little old lady to shout the word f**k? Get another sweet little old lady to yell the word bingo!
Why don’t they allow gambling in the Africa continent? Because of all the cheetahs.
How is a casino like a woman? Liquor in the front, poker in the back!
Where’s the only place in the world you are guaranteed to get screwed? Vegas baby!
What is the difference between a professional poker player and a dog? In about 10 years, the dog will quit whining.
What do you call a girl who is always in the bookies? Betty!
I walked around the casino last night with a pocket full of chips. Even now I am still trying to get the smell of vinegar out of my trousers.
Funny Gambling Puns 2020
How do you leave Vegas with 1 millions dollars? Go there with 2 millions.
Funny Gambling Puns Funny
Thanks.
Credit for the image at the top of the post goes to SXC.hu and sgman. Used under royalty free license.